teeth in my pocket......

Been at the new job a month now, and wow has that flown by...We had the Christmas do on Saturday, which considering was basically made up with couples, was actually quite a fun evening.  I had hoped to be able to totally let my hair down and have a drink and get a taxi home but as usual being a parent took priority and plus dealing with the boys with a hangover is not a pleasant prospective thought anyway.  So I did the evening sober while others around me got drunk and on the most part acted up and made prats of themselves.  Monday when I came in to work I defiantly felt much more part of the company and a bit more settled, I mean I had seen most of the managers and my bosses more than a little giggly and had also been sat on the table with my friend who just happens to be the person that organises everything for the company and made to feel very welcome.  Bless a few of the guys had tried to get me up on the dance floor to dance with them and their wives but that was a lonely heart step to far for me and I refused, though I did get up a few times when the ladies where dancing on their own.

On another note entirely its nearly here you know the "big day" which means I have been writing this blog for nearly 2 years and haven't things changed in that time. While I maybe a stronger person who is learning to live without, I am also discovering that I don't think I want to live with out so hope I won't have to forever :0)

The kids are as excited as ever about the day, if I can make it there without collapsing with exhaustion I think that will be an achievement on my part.  Its not that my kids are hard work which they are but no more than anyone else's, I think its just that I am their first and sometimes only port of call for all their thoughts, feelings, stress and excitement and its sooo draining. Don't get me wrong I wouldn't swap it for anything, I am just tired lol....

If I am honest with 5 days to go I'm still not exactly sure what I have bought and whether they will want any of it but heyho if this one goes pear shaped I will just put it down to first Christmas nerves (yes I know its not our first Christmas but it is without the looming shadow of Paul and all that entailed). As far as Father Christmas is concerned Ninja looked me in the eye the other day and said "Mummy, I'm pretty sure its you that buys all the presents, but I'll just pretend it's Santa because that's more fun" to which I said a little to shrilled "of course its Santa" I hate lying to them but Mooki told me when she caught me with the presents one year she was devastated and it has scarred her for life, so continue the charade I must and anyway the 3 year old won't be trying to sneak around and catch me out unlike his older brother which I have a feeling will probably be popping proplus all night waiting to catch me out just so he can say "see I told you so".

Oh if you are wondering still at the title of this blog post and you have made it this far, firstly well done and secondly they title comes from the fact I worn a cardigan to work today that I haven't seen for a while as its been hidden in the pit of the Mook and what should I find in the pocket but Mooki's teeth guard for bleaching her teeth........nice.

Staying strong................

Wheels keep turning and the kids keep me smiling.

Have you ever tried to brush a two year old teeth while they are chewing a fruit gum, those things are super glue for teeth under normal circumstances, with the added benefit of teeth being firmly clenched I needed a crowbar to prise his mouth apart.  You can imaging the taste can't you? as I started brushing, his face contoured and he said "disgusting".  Yes it probably is, very, but your teeth are being brushed. 

Next came the 10 minute chase around the bedrooms to brush his hair.  When I eventually caught him I tried in vain to brush the really really fuzzy bit at the back.  Somehow in between going to bed last night and getting up this morning the back of his head had been covered in still more sticky stuff that had stiffened his hair in to a horrible mat of knots that no amount of detangle spray could part. I gave up, brush the front to look smart and hoped no one would see him from behind all day.  As soon as it was done he messed it all up again by rubbing his fruit gummy hands all over it. Cue stifled cry of frustration from me.

Having accepted that this one was a lost cause this morning I headed over to number 1 son.  What an angel, only moaned alittle as I brushed his hair and even stopped playing his computer game long enough to brush his own teeth.  It was while we were having a conversation about the validity of Ham the Space Chimp actually being able to do some amazing stunt that I realised how quickly he is growing up.

Its bizarre when eldest was 6 I thought of her being so old and sensible and mature, and now he's 6 I still desperately want to baby him and not push him to hard or expect to much from him. I suppose that's the benefit with being a 2nd child. 

With eldest I hold her up as a shining example of can do and will do and isn't she fabulous, with the other 2 I'm not so preoccupied on them being the best, first, cleverest I just want them to be happy and comfortable.  Even knowing this I still can't help pushing her and I know I probably expect to much from her.  One saving grace I suppose is she knows I love her with all my heart and I am so proud of the woman she is becoming even though she makes the odd slip up now and again.  

So today I hold my head up high and say "I love my kids".